Slowly

Past day or so been feeling pretty down. The reason why is pretty clear to me. Its here. I'm sick of this place. Sick of being at work all the time, sick of dealing with some of the people at work, sick of the country I am in. But looking at things compared to a year ago, I do admit things were much worse then. Work for a start has actually become more bearable and at times not too bad. So why the long face so to speak?

Best analogy I can think of is smoking. 1 stick wont kill ya, hell, suckin on a lite cig would do even less, but keep it going day after day after day and slowly but surely it'll catch up with you.

The fact of being here for over a year. And no clear signal as to when I will be able to take some time out away from this place. Not talking days or weeks here. Months. It will take at least a month if not 2 for me to get over all this. Home sickness I guess some call it. Only thing I really miss about "home" is my car. I miss driving it, I miss being in it, listening to it, I just miss it. Vast majority of my tiredness is just work. simply can't stand jobs in which you do few hours but many days. Personally I'd go all out to make the effort to spend a straight 48hrs at work if it meant I got 5 full days off. Mainly I simply need time away from here. By here I don't necessarily mean this country. Just maybe this state. See more of this planet before I pass on. Rather than wasting all these precious hours of my life at work.